Grief is hard, even difficult at times to see someone go through and worse when you are going through it as well. It is definitely not a stair case of stages but a roller coaster of emotions and feelings.
In the mist of great loss, I felt I still found solace in meditation and thinking of all the things I was grateful for. It has been my focus and drive to continually think of the good feelings and good times I had with my grandfather. It has been hard to stay uplifted but phrases I keep telling myself are: “He would want you to keep going. Keep reaching for my goals, keep discovering new things. Heck he lived a good life and why not have a great one for myself.”
Here are some things to keep in mind when you are going through the stages of grief I found that really helped me.
- Talk about it. Talk to other people who have been where you are. Holding it in only makes it more hard to get over.
- Surround yourself with family and friends who care. Go out to dinner with friends have a good hard laugh. They don’t even have to say anything just be there for you.
- Eat your favorite comfort food: for me it’s rice, that’s another tale of it’s self. Comfort food, a favorite home cooked meal, eat it. Eating your favorite comfort food, will indeed bring you comfort, give you the good feels.
- Watch a funny movie: laughter is the best medicine. Watch a movie that makes you laugh so hard you cry and laugh harder.
- Write it down: write your loved one a letter telling how and what they meant to you. Pouring your feeling out on paper and sharing it with people who too cared about that person really helps.
- It’s ok to cry: I had to be told this a lot. I kept apologizing for how I felt and for crying. when really it’s part of grieving. Let it out. Ugly cry as one of my friends told me. Snot hanging from your noes, eye get all red and puffy. Don’t hold it in. The longer you wait the uglier the cry, so let it out.
- Its okay not to know how to feel. Feel whatever you want to feel. Sad, angry, empty, During this time period it can be hard to get back to a daily routine and it’s okay not to feel 100%. Just remember to keep going, moving forward.
- Go for a walk: put on some fun tunes and go for a walk around a park or neighborhood. Take deep breathes and inhale that great outdoor air.
- Exercise: Yoga, lifting weights or going for a run. Get those endorphins running through you, trust me it can definitely help.
- Time heals all wounds and so does living life. Go to the concert you have been waiting to go for 6 months. Go hiking with friends at the last minute. Go to the beach and build a fire. Live life! Experience it! I’m sure loved ones would hate you see you depressed and not doing the things you love. Continue to do what you love!
What makes you feel better? What lifts your spirits? Share, like and comment!